Lust was the lure
Yet, love endured (if only a moment)
Was it fake, the love?
We felt it!
We looked right at each other!
Although we only knew each other for the drunken moment, love passed between us
And lust gave way to a kiss (like no other)
Gentle at first, then all consuming
A kiss…that seemed endless…and of the ages
We don’t know when it stopped (any of it)
We just…stopped
And never saw each other again
Pregnant, now what?
Abortion was always on the mind
Now three? (It cannot be)
The question daily, “how do you feel?”
Fine, just bigger, and not alone (never alone)
Yet, all by myself
No friends or family or means
Yet, I always ate…and slept
Kindness followed me, but never ahead
Just always there precisely when I needed it there
We talked, every day
They heard the voice of their mother
And I heard their lovely voices with no sound
I could have stayed in that place with them forever
But they grew and grew and grew
Invisible before, people smiled at me
Real big smiles, happy smiles, full of love
Some touched me
Completely fine knowing I’d be Ok with It
And then he said, “Hey Girls”
The smiling Hobo came closer
“They’re gonna be as beautiful as their mama”
In the moment it took me to think, he was too far to catch
Me being so fat
The days seemed endless
Like this was now me forever
And I was fine with that
Until I woke up and knew
Today was the day
I knew it would come
Goodbye Day
The bus was full until it was not
I went for as long as I could
Until I knew this was the spot
Beautiful, flowers everywhere
They’d love it here
So, I got off in the middle of nowhere
I waited for the bus to leave
Then I turned and walked into the field of flowers
The sun was hot
The pain was getting stronger
I just walked until I stopped and laid down
I wanted to die with them inside me, as one
But they wanted out
And I couldn’t stop them
One by one
Three girls, the same but different
I sat there with them nestled in the circle of my legs
They didn’t cry, it was I who couldn’t stop crying
The sun was so hot
My hand touched them, one by one
And they touched me back
Again, it was time
I was prepared and I cut our tethers
Once I did, I knew they weren’t mine anymore
That’s what made it so easy
I stood up and walked
Walked in the direction of the sun
